It's my birthday and stuff

Sept. 4th

Today I am 26 years old.  It just hit me.  Panic?  More like a ringing in my ears, a slight compressed sensation.  26.  In Japan.  Sure.  Why not?

Western Style, My Ass

Sept. 3rd :

I had an interesting experience today while trying to take a dump in the school bathroom.  It could be comparable to most of my experiences here in this foreign country thus far.

At first I wanted to be alone, so I waited for my moment of privacy.  I noticed the 2 sets of toilet shoes as my first clue that I was the only person in the bathroom.  I slipped a pair on knowing full well that should someone stumble into the bathroom my shoes would be a dead give away it was the American taking a dump.  But I was willing to chance it just in case someone came in and saw 2 toilet shoes but heard someone in the bathroom and thought, "eew, gross - potty shoes American!"  At least taking a crap is somewhat more universally forgivable. Perhaps 'potty shoes' is not so much.

So - I enter the "western" style stall.  My excitement for the familiar is quickly replaced with sadness and disappointment.  There is a toilet with a seat, yes, but the seat is wrapped with a terrycloth seat cover.  A moist terrycloth seat cover.  But a seat none the less so I take it.  I think it was the coffee that induced an urgency to the bathroom - DAMN than amazing caffeine rush in the morning!   

Double edged sword : No coffee - tired and slow through the day but no midday dumping. Delicious can of sweet cold coffee - life is great until 2:00 when public dumping is necessary.

Back to the imagery of me on the terrycloth toilet seat, my own little piece of Dante's Inferno.  I have gotten over the first few foreign obstacles but here is the test.  I begin my usual toilet session and things are moving along.  A ray of hope for a quick return into the office and avoiding public awkwardness.  No sooner am I enjoying this thought, my body betrays me.  I have no control and I don't know whatever gave me that idea.  It's stuck.  A moment of panic.  I can hear the kids in the hall.  What do I do?  Push? Reposition? I hear something!  Pinch? Pause?  At this point I'm playing tug of war with my butt.  

I know I am at no place to fully retreat so i bare down for my last desperate attempt to save myself from another experience of a cultural unknown...and the very familiar sting of humiliation.  I grab for the toilet paper which is housed in its own roll of terrycloth.  Embroidered on the terrycloth the words, four seasons.  I hope they are referring to the changing of the weather because this is sure as shit (pun intended) NOT the Four Seasons hotel I can tell you that.  

As I conclude my experience I leave the stall feeling slightly molested.  The floor is wet, the toilet seat is damp terrycloth and who knows where these toilet shoes have been before me?  I can only hope this experience will make me a stronger person and I will begin to feel anything close to optimism again.  Maybe tomorrow or maybe after I take a shower, when my body is mine again and not this foreign place's.

Co-dependence and Abandonment

September 2nd :

Left here like a helpless baby.  LUNCH? Ahem!? 

Nobody waits for people to eat here, they just begin their meals when they arrive.  And if engaging in a conversation about how the school lunches work it's perfectly acceptable for someone to interrupt without so much as an excuse me and then take the person I was talking to away -- even if I am desperately trying to figure out why I am alone in the staff room and if I'm suppose to help bring the lunches out and when I finally get to eat!

Possibly the funniest moment in my life - after a meager attempt to independently find lunch - with no success, I solemnly walk back into the office.  No one is here.  No one.  The only sound that can be heard is...crickets.  No joke.

Crickets, to mock my co dependence and abandonment.

 

Give it to me one more time

Back log : August 22nd (I guess I was trapped in an English speaking body in Japan)

"O" sensei laughed with his whole body when "S" sensei explained to me she didn't have the Japanese writing instruction book for "young kids".  O sensei chimes in, "young kid?  Young kid?" as it is often customary for Japanese people, trying to understand an English conversation, to do by repeating your last words (or maybe in every communication transaction between 2 foreign speakers).  He looked at me, at which moment I point to myself and said "young kid" to express it is I who needs children's books to help me with the writing order of Japanese letters.  

My simple gesture (and coy facial expression) seemed to trigger an attack of spasms all over his body as he threw his hands in the air and moved in every which way as he laughed.  More fluid then a jelly fish was his ability to move his whole body in opposite directions at once.  This laughter was unlike any I'd ever seen!  The spackling of his voice in the air to match, was child like as if he saw something he had never seen before and his reaction was purely physiological and involuntary.  I wish I could describe the sound of his laughter but I fall short by saying it was a contagious ringing of short burst of noise...worst analogy ever : like a ghost was tickling him.  yes.  A ghost. 

Internets happen.

Back log : August 22nd (apparently I had a lot on my mind)

What an amazing process!! After 3 weeks of Internet talk - my supervisor comes in the office in the middle of her teachers' training to ask about which Internet I want to use (there are few different servers).  Apparently, the Principal is on the phone with the "Internet people".  Just fifteen minutes later a man appears from the "Internet" company. 

The elastic had worn out on his slender face and the delicate folds of skin gathered around his cheeks and mouth.  They moved with the inertia of his body, smiling then not, looking down at his notepad.  His Hello Kitty tie said it all really.  

He is here to sort it out.  My address and phone number just about does it and he is off to work on setting up my Internet.  As quickly as he shuffled in, he shuffled back out.  I watched as his green plastic visitors slippers (much too small for his extending feet)  slid over the abused parquet office floor.  The sliding doors clammered shut to trap the precious supply of AC.   

Side note : There is no reason to be upset or impatient.  It always comes through.  If impatience has proceeded it has smothered any chance for genuine appreciation.

Speech Contest

It was speech contest day.  What an experience.  There were about 30 kids giving speeches.  Half were speeches that they had written, the others were recitations of stories.  Both were interesting by their own merit.  The English pronunciation was...developing.  Some students spoke very clearly in their speeches, some speeches I think were in English.  But that is neither here nor there.  There were also some very interesting topics.  The winner gave a speech about suicide in the junior highs.  It was titled, We Are All Involved.  Heavy, but she was looking for a KO and she got it.  Another heavy topic was people who had to hide in a cave during the war and another was about being in a car accident.  Very intense.

The second section was students reciting stories they had memorized.  These stories are unlike any I've ever heard before.  Stories of a little girl dying under a tree after the bombing of Hiroshima, stories of sinners bobbing up and down in the river of blood in the floor of hell, nursery rhymes here.  Brilliant.  Unfortunately (for my 4 young aspiring English speakers) the people who won this category recited stories of Beauty and Beast and Goldie Locks and the 3 bears.  All of which had alternative endings like I had never heard before...I think my favorite was the story where 1 man lost his wallet and another man found it.  The man who found it returned it with all its original $300 in it but the owner of the wallet wouldn't take it because technically he "lost the money".  But the person who found it, couldn't take the money because it wasn't his!  And after arguing back and forth the landlord settled the argument by throwing in $100 of his own money so they could each have $200.  The reasoning, the rationalization to this story : they could both take the money because they were each at a loss of $100, including the landlord (who had nothing to do with the wallet) and then the landlord took them all out for dinner!  Doesn't this make sense?  This is Japan.

As the judges came back in the woman with the microphone announced the weinners.  The weinners.  one more time, the weinners.  I know this is bad karma or something, but really just cultural observation I feel it is my obligation to share the irony of an English speaking contest, critiquing on pronunciation and repeating the words weinner more times than I could handle.  I loved it and yet was disturbed by it all at the same time.  I think that is the definition of acclimating to another culture...don't question just take all in.

some new things

I did all by myself.  I paid my bills at the convenient store, 3 bills, electricity and 2 phone bills.  I sent 4 pieces of mail to the states and had a nice "discussion" with the postman how to address Japanese envelopes.  To address on the front, from address on the back.

(I had to stop and think about the word discussion....I have not had one of those here with a Japanese person ever, such an interesting concept for my life in Japan).  

So, after my delightful stop at the post office I was off to the train station heading to Otsu for my re-entry permit.  Not only did I not know where the office was, I didn't have my form to get the permit.  But!  I managed to find my way to the stamp station, pay the 60 yen for the stamps, and get directions to the proper permit building!  When I arrived I was able to find the form, fill it out (without my usual prolonging fret that increases my form filling time to twice as long).  Filled it out and asked the nice man at the desk questions that I was unsure of.  I got about 5 minutes of Japanese soap opera in before I had my permit and I was out of there.

Next up, shopping.  I really just needed a watch.  

Shopping is what keeps me questioning my allegience to the female gender.  I'm terrible at it.  I start out telling myself, I know what I need.  I think I know what I need.  I have a list.  I have 3 lists.  It starts with one thing...'just focus Kyla'.  A watch.  I keep looking at my wrist and am constantly disappointed (unlike this very second as I watch Ryan Gosling and Rachel McAdams in The Notebook....never disappointing.) 

So I enter Parko, this giant mall...I am feeling excited.  I accomplished all my goals for the day and I had a little too much cash in my wallet, the mall seemed like a perfect idea.  First stop swatch...right?  Hmm...TOO MANY CUTE CLOTHES on the way....what to do?  Try everything on....but I collect myself and decide...I'm here for a watch.

Watch found! Swatch.  I thought something utilitarian, something that would work with every outfit and just simply tell me the time.  But...then I found this watch and clearly fashion could not be compromised. (sorry it looks like my arms are dead - awful fluorescent lighting!)

So after I had the taste of doling out cash I went looking for, ya know, 'just a top'.  I stumbled into this fantastic store called Natural Beauty Basics...Not only were these clothes Kawaii (cute) but it reminded me of how liberating it is to buy new clothes.  And so I did.  Before I made a *small* purchase I made 2 fantastic discoveries...you have to take your shoes off before going into a fitting room - does anyone else think that's too much? - and when trying on shirts you must first put one of these on....no joke.

Well...after my adventure in shopping it was definitely lunch.  I found a great Italian place with a view, ordered some pasta with mushrooms and cream sauce and had a glass of wine.  I was slightly miffed that they were out of garlic bread but I was not going to let it spoil my celebration for self reliance.  I read a little bit of my book, Love in the Time of Cholera and tried to relax but couldn't figure out if this restaurant was a place where you could hang out or if it was an 'eat your meal and quickly remove yourself' kind of place.  I made a terrible oversight in the clothing shop by taking a pair of leggings out of it's plastic bag and would hate to be so presumptuous now! (Yikes big mistake...the clerk was not too happy) So I ate comfortably but then left.  It was getting dark anyway.  Now, if I could just make it 5 escalators down without finding something else I "needed".

No! The answer is no.  I found the home shop!!!  OMG.  I almost made it out but then there it was, pillows, blankets, beds, couches, lamps and SO CUTE!  I went back and forth between pillows and bedding.  The new bedding made itself into the fitting room with me where I left it deciding I was not there for bedding.  But neither was I there for the clothes necessarily but it didn't stop me from getting another top with tank for underneath...woops.  

Okay...long blog but in the end I will tell you, after doing all of these things by myself today I am starting to feel like I live here.  Despite the fact that I still know practically nothing about the culture and language I have made my way through today.  I owned everything about today and I began to feel at home.  Maybe it is because I am returning to me, the girl who takes on the world.  Or maybe I am on an endorphin high from my retail therapy.  either way, it was a great day.